Feeling Encouraged!

Yesterday I went to the doctor for a follow up appointment. I was ecstatic when the nurse weighed me and had to keep pushing the nob on the scale to the left! I lost 12.5 pounds since the last time I was there on July 15th! That's wonderful encouraging news, especially because I've been feeling quite discouraged lately with this weight loss and exercise regimen that I've been on!

Therefore, I have decided to make my weight loss goals, smaller more realistic ones. Since it seems so impossible to lose 100 pounds (at the rate I am going); I have resolved to losing 25 pounds by Novemeber 7th - that's 3 months. That seems more attainable!

So I need your help. I need your encouragement! Send those emails! Fill me in on what you're doing and how it works for you. What are your goals? What are you doing to achieve them?

Thanks for your support, family! Stay tuned in.....more to come!

Four Pounds!

I am four pounds lighter and I am so proud of myself! I've been working out for the past two weeks and I've lost an average of 2 pounds per week. For the past 42 days I've been eating fruits, vegetables, lots of protein and drinking water. Cutting the carbs out of my diet has not only helped me to lose weight, but also to have a higher level of energy. For the first time in a long time, and without thinking about it, I bent over and tied my laces at the gym! This is something that most of you may take for granted; to me it was an accomplishment!

I must mention that I went to purchase a blouse last week and I had to purchase a smaller size that I normally do...that felt good! Even the sales associate said that the blouse I wore in to the stire was too big! Go me!!! :)

FYI...I have decided against doing the "Rapid Weight Loss Program" that I mentioned in a previous post. I am going to take my time and do it nice and slow.

Please keep the notes, emails and comments coming. It's very encouraging for me. For the most part, the feedback that I've gotten has been very positive and uplifting. Believe it or not your positive vibes gives me energy. Those days when I am tired after a long day at work and I don't feel like going to the gym, your words of encouragement ring in my ear and give me the push that I need to get there and workout!

Two Pounds

Today was a good day. I snacked on 'strawbellies', as Madison calls them and grapes. I had left over curry chicken with spinach for lunch and enjoyed a low fat, low calorie strawberry yogurt for dessert. I drank only three bottles of water today and have to figure out a way to make it more convenient to drink more throughout the day. After work I went to the gym again (I went last night too) and to my surprise I stayed on the treadmill for 60 minutes! WOW! I started reading an excerpt to a very interesting book that I am trying out for the book club session that I will be hosting soon with a few girlfriends. The excerpt contained only two chapters. It was so interesting. If I had the whole book, I probably would have stayed on the treadmill until I finished it. I really am proud of myself. I've been working out for a week and a half now and I've already lost 2 pounds! When I got home, Gordon made a Cedar Plank Salmon on the charcoal grill with, guess what, spinach sauteed in garlic. I eat a lot of spinach don't I? I am hoping for some popeye muscles! :)

Tomorrow I plan to visit a medically supervised weight loss center to determine whether or not I want a little jumpstart in My Journey. The weightloss center's website is http://www.garciaweightloss.com/ Check it out and tell me what you think, I'd love to hear what you have to say. The plan will consist of B12 injections on a weeekly basis, vitamins, and appetite suppressants. I'll let you know how it goes. I am excited. It has worked wonderfully for two women I know.

Before I sign off and go to bed, I really thank all of you who have left me emails and messages of encouragement and support. It is overwhelming the love that I am getting from my friends and family. I am inspired when I am told that I am an inspiration! Thank you very much for all of your support!

Stay tuned for more on, "My Journey".

In the meantime...

I know that there is more that you want to hear and I've left out some important details about who inspired me to take the first step and who has actually been holding my hand...that will come. I've got to be inspired to write the way I did in my first entry.

However, 'in the meantime', I'll fill you in on what I've been doing.

For the first time in my life, I actually enjoy and look forward to going to the gym. This past week alone I've gone almost every night with the exception of Thursday night. I go after work, spend at least 45 minutes on the treadmill non stop and then I leave. On Thursday I got together with a few girl friends at my favorite restaurant, GrillSmith. They ordered like 4 or 5 different appetizers, all my favorites and of course items that I just can't do right now. I was so proud of myself when I didnt even taste a thing! It wasnt even hard to do. I have made up my mind that there are certain things that I just cant eat right now and that's it! If I do, I will never reach my goal and that is not acceptable. Its a simple equation.

Last night, Gordon and I went to the movies. We saw, "The Taking of Pelham 123," good movie, by the way. For the very first time in my life I did NOT have any popcorn at the movies. The other thing I am proud of is that when I have been to the movies in the past, I am the person in front of you on line that you complain is taking to much time because I make them put the butter on the bottom, middle and top of the popcorn. Yes, in layers. So when I didnt have any popcorn at all...that was progress, my friends!

Stay tuned....more to come...

Thirty Days!

Today is the 30th day of "My Journey" and the 1st day of this blog. I didn't want to go public, until I had enough confidence in myself to do so. I haven't even told my best friends about this quest. So far, I've only shared My Journey with 4 1/2 people, my immediate family (Mom, Husband and 2 year old daughter) and two close co-workers. Trying to lose weight has been an uphill battle for most of my life. I've been on and off of most diets for the past 12 years. I've started and stopped and started again. I've had "gym partners", "personal trainers" and "cheerleaders". I've made the declaration many of times saying, 'I am on a diet and I am going to lose weight' and then I've had to embarrassingly eat my words (no pun intended).

Growing up in the Bronx, I've always been self conscious about style, fashion and of course my body. Being a BIG girl for most of my life, I've never really been satisfied with my weight, neither have I ever been careful about what I eat. You've heard it before, 'your body is God's temple, so take care of it'. Well, even though I consider myself to have a pretty tight relationship with the Lord, I've never taken the time to take care of my temple. Although I am a pretty confident chick, I've battled for many years with my self esteem, all of my issues are weight related and have to do with how I felt about myself; but mostly my issues were about what I thought other people thought about me - because of my weight.

I moved to Florida in September 2000. Upon my arrival, I purchased a bike, a gym membership and I was on a mission to get myself in shape. This was a new life, with new people - who didn't know the 'me' before, therefore couldn't judge me on what was. I spent lots of time in the evenings and on the weekends working out, riding my bike and walking around my new, beautiful, well manicured neighborhood. Needless to say that was a short lived mission once I got married in October 2001! With meeting the man of my dreams, living in total bliss, becoming a wife and not to mention he's a great cook, the "get in shape mission" slowly dwindled.

Fast forward five years to 2006. The same month I was scheduled to take the LSAT I instead celebrated becoming pregnant and mourned my grandmother's death. That year I struggled through the pregnancy, gave birth to a miracle child and ultimately gave up on myself! After putting on an additional 36 pounds during the last stages of my pregnancy, I gave up even trying. I was now a mother with a new focus and made no time for 'me'. I convinced myself that this was my life and I was born to be this way. If I was going down, I decided that I might as well enjoy the ride.

Enjoy the ride I did, adding about 40 extra pounds in the last three years! Eating anything, anytime, anywhere without even a thought. Accepting my demise - suffering silently.

In October 2007, I started working for a restaurant chain. Being a paralegal by trade it was natural for me to manage the legal function at the corporate office. Of course the perks, parties and discounts that come along with a position like this did not help my weakness. Fortunately for me, the 50 or so people that I work with are all health conscious, watching what they eat and watching their weight, and that struck a cord with me. Here I was the only overweight female in this office, and I wasn't even trying to make a difference in my own life. All of the women in the office were slim and beautiful and even though I smiled often I was suffering inside. I struggled. I struggled. I struggled. I went through phases of hating myself to phases of I just don't care about myself.

Then on June 19, 2009 my Mother's very close friend died suddenly. No one expected it and it came as a shock to us all. She was a very intelligent, loving, caring, generous woman; however, she too was over weight. Her death was a wake up call for me. She died on Friday. I died on Monday. I died to my old self and my old ways. I died to my deceptive thoughts. I died to the self hatred. I died to the self destruction. I died to that silent struggle. I died to myself.

On Monday, June 22nd I finally made up my mind that this was it! I chose to live. I conjured up what little confidence and courage I had left and I made the decision to take control of my life for good and it's been the best feeling I've ever had. For the past 30 days, I've been eating right. I've given up soda, bread, rice, pasta, sugar and Mc Donald's French Fries! I've been drinking a lot of water and eating a lot of chicken, fish, vegetables and fruit. This past weekend I reinstated my membership at the YMCA and I've been working out everyday for 45 minutes a day. For the first time in my life, I feel like I am in control of my life.

It's not over, in fact My Journey has just begun. It's only been thirty days. However I've heard it said before that if you do something for 30 days it becomes a habit. I am believing that saying will remain true for me.

Stay tuned for more as I document, "My Journey".